Archive for July, 2013

sayitI am one of those people who say what they mean and mean what they say. Now usually I write in a lot of my posts that I don’t want or expect people to try to be like me, but I actually do wish people were more like that in this respect. It would make life so much easier. It just seems like people just say certain things either because they hear other people say it or maybe just to hear themselves talk. I’m not even sure why they do it really. Below is just a short list of things that people have said to me often throughout my life and I know with certainty (and with proof) that they don’t mean it at all.

  1. “Let me know if you need anything at all.” Maybe this one is my fault. Perhaps I have been misunderstood. Is it that the person literately means just let them know and that’s it? You see because all this time I’ve been under the assumption that it was implied that they wanted you to let them know if you need anything so they could actually help in some way.  Now I understand they just want to be notified and that is all. I think saying “let me know if you need anything” is just a kind formality. I think people just want to feel and sound like they’re being helpful without actually helping. I guess people just say this not actually thinking the person may actually come to them for help.
  2. “You should’ve told me! I would’ve…” Ooooh this one just burns me up. This is a sure way to annoy the crap out of me.  The first thing that irks me about this statement is the shoulda coulda woulda context. It’s like wasted breath. Why are we even talking about something so irrelevant? Yeah, I could’ve and you would’ve but guess what? We didn’t! So why is this even being discussed? The other thing that trips me out is that 90% of the time I did tell the person and they just forgot or I told them on a previous occaision in the same scenario and they weren’t able to come through. So now I have the perfect, simple response for those people: “I did tell you.” I’ve noticed there’s not much more they can say to that and it will usually shut them up for the next time as well.
  3. “I’ll keep you in my prayers.” Okay so I don’t have any actual proof of this one, but I highly doubt that the majority of people who say this actually follow through and do it. It’s like we just broke bread and you didn’t even pray over your food. Do you really expect me to believe you’re praying for me when we part ways? If so, why not just pray for me right now while I’m right in front of you? What are you waiting until later for? Again, it’s just something to say to sound comforting I suppose. People should really stop saying this if they’re not actually doing it.
  4. “How you doing?” Simple right? Have you ever noticed how many people actually wait for your response or just start talking? Or how about when you ask them that, how many people don’t even respond at all? Oh, and you gotta love the people who ask you this back to back within the first two minutes because they forgot that fast that you already answered that question, and they probably weren’t paying attention to your response anyway. Why? It’s a formality, just something to say, open the conversation with. People don’t actually want to know how you’re doing. I would venture to guess that a good portion of you don’t even want to know how people are doing when you ask lol. I think we all know this subconsciously and that’s why not a lot of time is spent on the question.
  5. “Let me let you get off this phone.” Really? Let me get off the phone? Maybe I’m missing something here but I thought anyone can end a call whenever they’d like. It’s even funnier when you’re the one that called the person and they’re letting you go. No, that’s not the way it’s supposed to work! I called you! If anyone is gonna let anybody go, it should be me! Seriously, why are people so afraid to just tell the truth? When I’m ready to end a phone conversation I’ll either tell the person what I’m about to do or simply say, “Well I’m gonna go now.” How hard is that? Why must people act like they’re doing you a favor or pretend like they’re taking up too much of your time when really they’re just ready to get off the phone? I hereby give you all permission to end phone calls. There, now there should be no more reason for you to feel guilty about getting off the phone when you feel like it :).

I’m sure there are probably plenty more things people say but don’t mean. I just can’t think of anymore at the moment. It’s a shame. Once upon a time word was bond. Now you can’t even trust that anymore. People just walk around in every day conversations saying a bunch of random things they don’t mean for what reason?

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slave2Normally I don’t get caught up in the hype. I’m not usually a bandwagon person. However, I have to admit, the verdict in the Zimmerman trial struck a nerve in me like I’ve never felt before. I still can’t quite put my finger on it, but I think it’s because of everyone’s reaction. True colors were really shown. I even found myself having emotional outbursts, venting my frustrations on Facebook like others. I understand that the ground is split on whether this case had anything to do with race or not. Whether you believe it did or didn’t, you can’t deny the fact that it certainly stirred up a lot of racial tension. As I watched the news online, anchors going at it, people online going at it, and so on, it triggered a lot of deep thoughts for me.

I’ve seen posts on Facebook where people are deleting “friends” because they now view them as racist based on their comments regarding the case. The posts I’m seeing most are about technicalities and the law; the law, the law, the law. This is where my train of thoughts has landed and sort of dwelled the past few days. I’m looking at how this one case is tearing so many people apart. You think you know a person, then something like this forces their hand and they say things you’ve never would’ve imagined. So I ask, what if we woke up tomorrow and the slavery of black people was legal? Suppose a law was passed across the country where blacks were no longer allowed to be free? What would happen?

slaveTo the black people whose solution to the Zimmerman case was to hold peaceful rallies and pray about it, would you also hold peaceful rallies and pray if someone kicked down your door right now and shackled you up? To the black people whose solution was to riot, would you riot in your own little slave courters and tear up all of your stuff? To any of the people (black or other) who said this trial wasn’t about race, would you say the same and turn a blind eye once the law was announced that slavery of blacks was legal? To the black people whose answer was violence and to fight back, would you fight back against your slave master? Would you even be ready for that type of fight? Would you have an organized strategy ready or would you just go down, guns blazing like in some Al Pacino movie you’ve watched? To all the non-blacks so ready and willing to hold hands and stand alongside of blacks, ready to help, would you do the same if slavery became legal? Would you harbor a black runaway, knowing it was against the law, and you could be punished by said law?

By now, a lot of you may be saying, “What does one have to do with the other?” “That’s a dramatic comparison.” “That would never happen anyway.” Well, I’m not really making a comparison. All I’m saying is yesterday it was Emmett Till, today Trayvon Martin; we really can’t predict who or what will happen tomorrow. Can we? To anyone who thinks that it can’t happen in this day and age, you may want to think again. We, as black people, are a very trusting people for some reason. Despite how media portrays us, we are also a very peaceful people. Half of us are busy watching reality TV and shaking our booties to whatever mindless music is hot today. The other half of us are putting our every effort into being equal to and accepted by others, either wasting money on material possessions or running away from being black in any way we can. It is not until something tragic like this happens that we are snapped back into reality and reminded of our position here in this country, in this world really. Therefore, I don’t think it would be that easy for us to be blind-sighted, caught totally off guard and unprepared if slavery was to be reinstituted tomorrow. No, I am not trying to stir up some race war. It just seems like it always takes something extreme for people to show who they really are. I just feel like black people have been doing the same things for so long, receiving the same results. My question to all of you (black, white, red, yellow, whatever) is what would you do?

eathGrowing up there were a lot of things I didn’t eat or drink like fast food, pork, white bread, Kool-Aid, and I’m sure there’s more I can’t think of right now. The reason why I didn’t eat or drink these things is because my mom didn’t give it to me. The reason she didn’t give it to me is because she was trying her best to make healthy choices for me. So naturally once I was fifteen and started working at McDonalds, I was questioned and ridiculed when I confessed I didn’t know anything about Sausage Egg McMuffins and Bacon, Egg, and Cheese-whatevers.

Since reaching adulthood, I’ve learned about even more foods that may not be the best for my body and overall health; so I stopped or cut back eating them. It has nothing to do with trying to be skinny or just hopping on the bandwagon. I tested different things out, and I noticed when I subtracted certain things from my diet I saw changes in my body. When I cut back on the beef, my digestive system started working more properly. When I started eating more grapefruits, my muffin top stomach started to go down. When I stopped drinking concentrated orange juice and started drinking 100% orange juice, my nails started to grow longer and healthier. For me, the better choices just began to become clearer in what I ate.eath1

Whenever I tell someone I don’t eat pork, it’s almost like they take it personally, like they birthed the damn pig that I am turning down. They jerk their neck and say, “WHY? What’s wrong with pork? Ain’t nothing wrong with pork!” Then I have to explain to them how I’ve never eaten it, I’m not a Muslim, and if I try to eat it I get sick. When I tell people I never drank Kool-Aid growing up, they tell me I’m not black, and again, get offended lol. I’ve had someone tell me I eat “rich people food”. Forget about when I was trying out my vegetarian experiment. I don’t think I’ve had so many eyes rolled at me in my life!eath3

I just don’t understand. I am not in the habit of telling people what they should eat. I just simply tell them what I eat or don’t eat and only when the situation arises. I’m not asking anyone to cook for me or do anything for me, and I don’t judge them for what they eat. I think people should do what they want. If you want to put yourself at higher risks for ailments and diseases all for the good taste of that pork chop or that swig of Kool-Aid, go right ahead! My question is why does it bother others so much that I choose to at least try to eat healthy? I definitely still have my weaknesses and I’m not a health nut. It just so happens that a lot of the food I do like and have always liked happens to be good for me. Why is that such a major offense to folks?