Archive for June, 2013

Howdy folks! I know it’s been a long time since I’ve done a poetry video so (drumroll)……Here it is!! This poem is about the black entertainment industry, all that’s wrong with it, and those who aspire to be a part of it. Feel free to stop by the poetry lounge to see the written form.

 

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It’s funny. Growing up I never really knew when Father’s Day was. Since my father was absent, there really wasn’t any reason to take note of the day I guess. Also, many of my friends didn’t have fathers in their lives either. So I guess you can say I was just sort of oblivious to the day. Even still as an adult I never even realize Father’s Day is coming up until it’s here. Usually I find out online, which brings me to this week’s blog post. It wasn’t until I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed this past Sunday that I realized it was Father’s Day. I kept seeing a lot of similar posts. Some were genuinely wishing fathers a happy Father’s Day but more were wishing single mothers a happy Father’s Day.

I understand that there are a lot of single mothers out there doing it all on their own due to dead beat dads. Of course there are the exceptions like the death of a father or something like that. However, for the most part the fathers are just dead beats. I don’t have any children but I understand it’s hard. One of the many reasons (and there are so many) I don’t have any children is because I would never want to be a single mother. With that being said, it doesn’t matter how hard it is. Just because the father is M.I.A. doesn’t automatically turn the mother into a father. Even my own mother has used that expression “I’ve had to be a mother and a father”, but it’s just not so. No woman can ever be a father, and mothers need to realize this.

I thought I was alone with this opinion until my friend sent me this video. I like how she mentions that when women are patting themselves on the back for playing the father, they are just putting themselves on display for all to know the poor choices they’ve made in men. I also love how she keeps repeating the word man. Ladies, you will never be men and therefore cannot be a father. I’m not bashing single mothers either. Some of you knew the low lives you were dealing with when you decided to have his baby but some of you truly didn’t. But like she says in the video, you have your day. It’s called Mother’s Day. Please stop lying to yourselves by saying you are playing both roles. You can never play both roles because you are not a man! Yes, it’s unfortunate but it just is. A mother can never teach her children things from a perspective of a man because…..SHE’S NOT A MAN!

I just want to point out one more thing before I leave this post. I would say in the past 2-3 decades single motherhood has become popular, especially with black women. It’s damn near expected these days. To all you single mothers, I just want to say look at the state of our black youth today. So many are in jail, dancing in strip clubs, single parents themselves, on drugs, dropouts, gay/lesbians, etc. No, I’m not saying it’s the mother’s fault at all. I’m just saying that this should tell you that something is missing from single motherhood. It’s called the real father. So while you single mothers may be doing your best, and your best may be awesome, you are not a father. Please stop convincing yourselves that you are.

gayThis post will be a short one because I don’t have a lot to say on the topic. I’m more so interested in the thoughts and opinions of others. Recently I have either come into direct contact or have heard stories of reformed homosexuals. I have talked to and/or heard about both males and females who were once gay but now say they aren’t anymore. In my mind, it is hard for me to comprehend how this might work. This is one of the reasons I am writing this post. I hope to gain some perspective from readers and possibly get a better understanding.

Let me say that I do wholeheartedly believe that a lot of homosexuality of today’s world is a trend, a fad. Yes, I really do believe that. Of course I know that there are real, true homosexuals and it is my belief that they are born this way. However, I also believe in the current year of 2013 it has turned into something else. The power of suggestion amongst many many other factors has reared its head. So I can see how someone who isn’t a true homosexual can end up living a homosexual life (if that makes sense). My question is how do you reverse that though? It just seems like such a permanent decision that would be hard to reverse, particularly for men.

I’ve talked to some people about it, some who are going through the transition and some who know people close to them who are. Basically, they told me the same thing. Homosexuality is like any other demon (i.e. alcoholism, lust, jealousy) and if you pray on it hard enough and really want it, God will remove those demons from you. That sounds good but it makes me think of something I once heard a preacher say. He was openly mocking the congregation saying how people love to testify that they use to be an alcoholic but God removed the taste from their mouth. He went on to say that after 30+ years of being saved and being a pastor, he still gets the taste for alcohol and that people who testify to the contrary are just lying to themselves and the congregation. He said what it is, is that God gives him the discipline and willpower to say no to those things, but the taste and the temptation is still ever present. I would have to say I agree with him on that. So getting back to the subject at hand, can you really pray away your homosexuality or is it just that you have the willpower to fight that temptation? And if the desire is still there and you’re just fighting it, can you really say you’re not a homosexual anymore?

Lastly, I have one final question on this. This is for the ladies. Would you date a man who says he used to be a homosexual? I’m not talking about Raheem who just did a 10 –year bid in the federal penitentiary. That’s a whole ‘nother issue which requires deeper levels of discussion. I am talking about the average Joe who at one point was openly gay. Somewhere along the way he got religious (or whatever caused the change), and decided he wasn’t going to be a homosexual anymore. Ladies, would you date this man? I am asking the ladies because I assume I already know the answers of the fellas posed with the same question regarding a reformed lesbian. With the shortage of men out here, I really want to know if a woman would date a reformed homosexual male. Feel free to comment! 

increaseYesterday I was listening to a gospel station on Pandora, and a song came on talking about increase. I don’t remember the exact words but the chorus sang about asking and believing God to provide increase in your life. It got me to thinking about a trend I am seeing in churches today. Perhaps the trend has always been there, but I’m seeing it more widely spoken about in churches in the present. I’m talking about the prayer or mention for financial increase.

Now I have only attended church in the United States (as far as I can remember anyway). So when I’m sitting in church people who have clean clothes, cars, homes, jobs, and families surround me. That’s just from what I can see. While I am well aware that all of these things I’ve mentioned cost money to have and maintain, it seems to me that we have a lot more than a lot of people around other parts of this world. The more I thought about this, the more I began to realize that no matter how much of an increase God gives us throughout life, it never seems to be enough to satisfy us. We are always asking for more. What are we doing with what God has given us already?

images-95Once upon a time I would spend about 5% of my time thanking God during prayer and the other 95% of the time asking God for favors or for “increase” in some way, shape, or form. I’m not exactly sure where the transition occurred along the way, but now most of the time when I pray I just spend that time thanking God for all that I have and all that he’s done already. I try not to ask for anything these days. Yes, there are still things I want or need (or think that I need), but when I stop and take an account of my life I realize I already have way more than I deserve. How dare I ask him for increase when I haven’t even taken the time to appreciate or make the most out of all the increase he’s already given me?

It just seems to me that if we spent less time preaching increase and more time evoking the spirit of gratefulness, we might realize we already have more than enough. It’s like the more increase we get, the more we squander. Then we turn around and ask for more increase. God provides us with intelligence and logic. These are the tools we sometimes overlook that can help us achieve and maintain the increase we want. Furthermore, I think that spending more time being grateful and saying thank you will lead us to realize that we may not even need the increase we think we do. It is up to us to make the most of what is given to us.

 

God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say thank you? ” 
— William Arthur Ward

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” 
— Epicurus