Two Way Mirrors – Excerpt #2 from Just Jewel’s Upcoming Novel

Posted: January 14, 2013 in Excerpts
Tags: , ,

Taken From Chapter 4

I smiled as soon as I awoke. I was always excited to see Cal. I was like a little kid on Christmas morning. I could feel the butterflies in my stomach. Even though I was excited, I was always extra nervous when I knew I was bringing something in. Anything could go wrong. The dogs could be there. One of the loons could slip out or the C.O. might feel them during the pat down. I could get caught passing the loons off to Cal, anything. He always tried to reassure me that nothing would go wrong, but I knew he couldn’t know that for sure.

I sat on the toilet for a while. I always got diarrhea from the nerves. Nothing came out though, so I got showered and dressed. I pinned one side of my hair up like I had the night before and sprayed some oil sheen in it. I looked good. I hooked up some grits, a beef sausage, and a scrambled egg. I washed that down with some orange juice. After eating breakfast, I carefully lined the loons up inside my pants again, checked my purse to make sure I had my I.D., and tossed in the bag of leftover tokens I had from the last visit. The tokens were to buy Cal some snacks from the vending machines during the visit. He usually never wanted anything, but I always brought them just in case either of us got hungry.

Just as I was about to head to the door to put on my boots, I felt my stomach bubble. Just like clockwork, the nervous diarrhea kicked in. It never failed. I would always try to go before I got in the shower, but it always waited until I was good and ready to walk out the door to come out. Dammit! I didn’t want to be running late, but there was no way I was about to hold in diarrhea for the next three hours.

I sat back on the toilet and did my duty. It came pouring and plopping out my ass like juice. It smelled something awful too, like somebody crawled up inside me and died. I pushed out loud, long farts. Some sounded like machine guns and some like shotguns. I hoped all the gas was out, so I wouldn’t have to sneak any silent assassins out in front of Cal. It felt like I was wiping for days. I looked at each wad of toilet paper with no end in sight and my suspicions were confirmed. I had mud butt. I used a couple of baby wipes to freshen up since there definitely was no time to jump back in the shower.

I had to get a move-on. Time was ticking and I definitely didn’t want to be late because those bitch C.O.’s would definitely turn me away. I farted in the car the whole way there. I let it rip so much and so hard, I thought I was sure to burn a hole right through the seat of my pants. I cracked the windows even though it was freezing outside. I lifted my butt from the seat and wiggled around a little to air out my jeans. I didn’t want the fart smells to settle in my clothes.

  1. YBF (Your Biggest Fan) says:

    I meant to sign “YBF” (not “YBB”, and not “BFF”)

  2. YBB (Your Biggest Fan) says:

    This is exciting Jewel. I’m waiting patiently; (if a wee bit anxiously) for the book. I am enjoying the feel of mystery, drama, and humor.

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